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If you've ever lost a family member, I don't need to describe the wrenching emotions that accompany the death of someone so close or the tears that still come unexpectedly. As the bossiest of my parents' nine children, I had to oversee everything my dad and Sheila left behind.
Months later, I was still picking through my father's military records, his guns dating to the Civil War, his 15 Bibles and Sheila's art supplies and pawnshop finds.
I started thinking about my own basement and closets. C., at age 21 and have saved almost everything I've accumulated since: racks of clothes I can't fit into (or wouldn't want to); thousands of books (including 18 copies of Shirley Chisholm's Unbought and Unbossed); enough spatulas to host a celebrity cook-off, minus the celebrities; and a collection of vinyl, cassette tapes and eight-tracks—Diana Ross, Barbra Streisand, Nina Simone, Boz Scaggs, the Temptations—that fills an entire room of my house, because apparently when I got into music, I got into music.
Then there are files from the political campaigns I've worked on: My garage is lousy with Bill Clinton and Al Gore.
It took every bit of inner strength I had to figure out what to do with these things that had great value for my father and sister, who now weren't around to answer my questions: "Why'd you buy that? " The guitars Sheila collected, the family gumbo pot I'd borrowed and then sent back to New Orleans after Katrina wiped out my dad's kitchen, the crucifixes he carved from tree branches—you can't just throw those things away!
And so my living room began to resemble a Catholic gift shop, my grief became inescapable and I sank into a mild depression.
[rpi] It appears that Donta is completely smitten, calling T-Boz his soulmate.